Blanks

Dedicated to the curious...

"Blanks"

She told me
I didn't have to be that way
That it saddened her
Them
To lose the qualities which lay within
Me
Us;
Guilt rose within a part of me
The part old
Dusty
Tucked away
But loved to the point
You can't bare to dispose of it;
It rose
Because despite my level of acceptance
There are still dreams
I dare to dream
Which slip away with each newly lit candle
Into a darkness I've never understood
Along trails of smoke
Fashioned from singed barrels
Aimed into nothingness
The pungent smell of futility
Lingering in my rooms
Saturating my clothes
emanating from my very being
In her eyes
Theirs
Making me want to crawl back to the womb
Deny procreation
Because choice never bestowed
Brings about Agony
Each time
She
They
In sadness away explain
My complicated existence;
Shooting blanks
I take aim again...
©2009clarencecbess