Free Association

I was going through some old pieces and ran across this one... Another snapshot in the moments that are the sum of myself. Enjoy.

"Free Association"

Anything that comes to mind
Sweet smells
The lotion she rubs on her hands
Cracked like mine
Splintered mahogany
My head it aches
Softly
Quietly
As I think of all
As I think of nothing
My phone's ringing
Better pick it up
Or get fired
Like I need to
Because that's when the fire's there
Under my ass
Gotta get it done
Finally I can focus

I'm hungry
For food
There goes the phone
Again
But I like writing
My only escape
What comes to me best
"Goooood morning Breakaway..."
I say it as dry as possible
With no life
I'd say I do this to pay my bills
But I can barely do that
Less than ten an hour
Almost thirty
Suicide
Too bad I believe in an afterlife
On the river Styx I ride
It looks so nice out
A nice roller-coaster riding day
I really liked Sheikra
Hope El Toro's worth the wait
This loud motherfucker
If I want Eddie Murphy
I'll go to the movies
Hip-hop
Sports
The lightning lost last night
Phone's ringing
Your account name or number please
Just a second while I "work"
Seems like I've been doing that
Forever
Will I?
Should I?
Give up

Almost thirty
And Mom's birthday is next week
I wish I could buy her that house
I use to promise her as a child
"Good morning breakaway...
One moment please..."
I'm typing bitch
You're interrupting the flow
"What Nicole?"
I like Nicole
Till I knew she was "family"
I thought she liked me
Too fuckin funny
I need to laugh
Want to see my friends
They're gonna be pissed
When I go away
Then again
That’s the whole point of the test
Just to see
If I can do it on my own
If I can actually survive
But aren't I doing that now?

She rubs more lotion
Sweet smells return
I need chap stick
I need love
I want love
Brian
And that is the truth
At least I've had love
And that is the truth
Shawn
And that is the truth
I'm hungry
Too early for lunch
Free association
What a great way to write..
©2006clarencecbess