Us Not Me

I thought it was fine
To think of you
To think of me
And leave it at that.

Truth is I was ignorant
At best
Stubborn
In my ways of old
A single digit
Needing only to follow along
The ray of my desire.

I thought it was fine
To think of me
First
Always
Forever
To a point
I didn't think
Thus nature this failing becomes
Leaving in It's wake
Hollow shells and memories
Best suited for target practice
In some lonely bar
On some lonely night;
Thought it was fine
Till I took a moment
To think of us
And saw how my actions
However unintentional
Devastated
Saddened
Angered you
Into a symphony of alarms
Seeking to drive you away
As before
And before that
And still before that again
In the consistency of my survival.

I thought it was all fine
Till I almost lost you
Save for your ability to welcome me
Repair me
Love me
Love us
And allow me to do the same...
©2011clarencecbess