Sweet

Sweet
Got a cavity just thinking of you
Tongue across lips
With memories replayed
Of how you teased
Trapping me in that golden moment
Natural
No fructose intoxicated stumble
No imitation sprinkle
Just packet upon packet
Of sweet
Raw sublime
A pinch here
A pinch there
More like a punch to my mind
As I wake
Wanting nothing more
Than to dip deep into your nectar
Purified ambrosia
My lick stick begging
For your cornucopia of flavors
©2011clarencecbess

Ugly People

I woke this morning
Heart racing
Pressure throbbing
To a sky gray and damp
Echoing my memories
Regurgitated in nightmares
Of ugly people
Mostly
An ugly man
I used to run away from
But now feel
I must make my way back to.

I woke
The pain in my chest telling
Of unresolved evils
Ugly people placed upon me
In their cruel attempts
To shape
Whittle me down
To whatever they envisioned me to be.

Woke
Slowly returning to myself
Understanding that ugly people
Predominantly this ugly man
Was an echo
A shadow
Periodically at my back
Between my ears
To remind me
The task is never finished
The mission never complete
In reconstructing one's soul
In an attempt to undo
A tightly knit tapestry of existence
One thread at a time....
©2011clarencecbess

Suddenly Prized

What could've been
Rest upon numerous faces
Looking to me now
Much too late for me to care
Beyond some script
To sum up the moment.

Again and again I want to ask
Why now?
Did it really have to be
That
Complicated?
That
Shallow?
The ability of we
To shatter hearts
Like a gunslinger at high noon
Attempting to make his way
Along the one road through town
Amazes me
Constant
Like the stares I receive now
Because suddenly
I am that which is desired...
©2011clarencecbess

Passing Through

Men are terrible animals
Solitary by nature
Needing little
But time
And a lay here and there
Solitary
Seeking companionship
When it most suits
When it fits
Like gloves
That can be kept
Socks that can be kept
Shirts that can be kept
Pants that can be
Kept
Scarves that can be kept
Things
That can be kept
For years and years
Stored
Begging to be thrown away
To be tossed away
To be renewed.

Men are animals
Hunting
On the hillsides
In the cold
Hunting in the heat
In the open
In the shade
For something
Maybe someone
To be kept
Or maybe thrown away;

I am a man.
I am
An animal...
©2011clarencecbess

Pillow Talk

Lord have mercy on these souls born today
Living in a world with one foot in it's grave
Children seeing fun in other's misery
Everybody running from responsibility

Contradicting nation at war
Yet sleeping with the enemy
Finding new ways to test the children
Before teaching them how to write and read
Every step forward
Is a slide back in line for me
Cattle to the call for them to slaughter me

All I'm really wanting
Is to wake from this dream now...

Take a walk with strangers
Holding hands with danger
Without a moment to breathe
My expanding waistline sees
Those behind the counters laughing
Lord have mercy on these trappings

And all I'm really wanting
Is to wake from this dream now...

Desperation breeds a syndrome
For thirty minutes of fame
Girls behaving badly
Just to have someone tweet their name
As a better dope hit the ghetto
Changed the game
Flying off the shelves
Ready-made to make insolent characters
Heroes
In the mind of children breeding children
Just to make a dime
As they danced to a beat
Inclined only to petrify
Not to have them fly

All I'm really wanting
Is to wake from this dream now...

The lord had mercy on my soul
Because I was born yesterday
As bad as it was, it was still a better way
As I walk amongst the dead now

All I'm really wanting
Is a way to wake from this dream now...
©2011clarencecbess

Mother Winter

Released from her womb
Forever I fell into doom
And questions within eyes
Each time that I pass them by
Of happenstance and why

But fate looms
On God's own plan
With my hands so dry
I try to make a man
Out of the boy
Which hides inside
Staring blankly out through eyes
Of happenstance and why

Each day I wake to look around
Try to make adjustments
To the changing sounds
Of my country
My skin tone
By sunset I realize each day
I am all alone
Cold
Without a home
Without a grave to rest my bones
I'm scattered to the wind
Increasingly unknown

She released from her womb
Left her consequence
And now I fall through doom
Part of a soul
part of a plan
Everything not of my own
Except my drying hands
I cannot hide
Each time they pass me by
In this rotation
Of happenstance and why...
©2011clarencecbess

After Dreams

Chilly sunrise welcomes me
Fading song sticking after dreams
Tired man speaks as they pass by
Within his eyes I lose myself and die
A thousand times a thousand so completely

Says we traded warrior for killing arms
Farms for rows of corn across the crown
Despite a freedom, most are still held down
No cause to fight, no reason to be better
Relying on what hopefully comes later

Blind, he asked me for a favor
My father taught me to be better
Pretending not to notice I tell him later
Make my way on illusions that it's safer
Somewhere underground within my mind

The more I look, the more I want to bleed
I petrify
Lost in never wanting to be me
Haunted, sometimes guided by my dreams
I scream at mysteries

He said it's our destiny to be denied
The more I look around, I think he's right...
©2011clarencecbess

Early-Morning Train

A rumble in the distance tells me I'm here
The tumble of my stomach warns me of fear
Somewhere out beyond my windows it creeps
And I should be crying

Someone doesn't want me angry today
I don't want to see myself go that way
Somewhere in the dark it's creeping
I'm up and yet I know I should be sleeping

But that's what has me up here in the morn
Sleeping with these enemies that I scorn
At every turn I feel they're trying to kill me
Nullify me like my government completely
As somewhere beyond these windows it creeps
Resolutions set to pull me in deep
Beyond a truth that I know the train is lying
And with each swipe I know I should be crying...
©2011clarencecbess

A VaJay-jae Monolouge

She looked like she could've been me
Down there
Between the truth
And the race to possibility;
Too much clay
Caked on with such urgency
And a 'do'
That only invited nightmares
To one's imagination.

Now next to her
In subtlety
Accentuated conformity
Outside of her crown
Reminiscent of the Kahn
Wild and untamed
Yet purposefully together;
They were together.
Shoulder to shoulder
Friend
Sista'
Lover?
Two Nubian delicacies
One lunch-time special
The other a main course
Punctuated with a glass of wine
Maybe creme bru-le'
And a sly smile
Cause you knew
You'd be gettin' some tonight...
©2010clarencecbess

Sentimental Questions

Sentimental questions
Flow across the mind
Overrun by tears
Each and every time
So I'm afraid to turn my tele on
Getting more connected
Yet I want to be alone
With my sentimental questions now.

No longer looking for a heaven
I've seen what it brings out of you
Inevitable judgments of blue;
Sadness is the question
Do we really want to know
The answer to what's greater than our self?
So I think I'll keep to myself
Working for the best of this hell.

Sentimental questions
Etched within the folds of their faces
All the questions of youth
Answered as proven lies to the test
Of going through the world not alone
Of conquering the decay of their bones...

Sentimental questions
Flow against my soul
In opposite directions
Of a truth I'd give a minute
Just to hold
Something beyond me
Truly connected
That has nothing to do
With my cellular phone;
No longer looking for your heaven
I wonder,
Would you care to be alone?
©2010clarencecbess

One-Sided Love Affair

With first sight
I wanted you
With first breath
I needed you
With first touch
I knew you
With first kiss
I loved you.

With first song
My soul was flying
With first wish
A blessing
As I lay with you
Confessing
And it's been said
But bears repeating
I loved you.

With first sigh
I thought you
With first tear
I knew you
With last touch
I lost you
Rued
There would be
No more I love you's
No quiet eyes
To watch you
No lips to kiss you
In moments private
And amazing

I loved you
Too bad you cannot say the same...
©2010clarencecbess

Kiss The Sky

You
Bind my wrist
You make me cry
Think I don't understand
How you deny

You look at me
You
Puppet we
Confuse our memory
Till we think
It we
And thus it be

Oh my, my little bird
Build your nest
Make it best
Push your children to the sky
Upon their wings
Before it take a cage
To have them sing

You
Want to be
Your history
Got me thinkin'
It be 'bout time
To uprise
Kiss the sky
Beyond the dream
Beyond those fantasies sold to us
Which make me want to scream

Little bird
Watch your wings
Before they
Clip
Your wings
Watch you fall
Now denied
Watch you fall
Beside the spring
Just to pick you up
Place you in cage
To sing

Oh my, my
How I try
Despite my wrist
Within these twist

Oh my, my
How I try
Despite these fist
I cannot raise
For it is believed the way
And though
You
Would bury me
Want to
Chop my tree
Get to testing me
I will survive
Because
I have survived
And thus
We survive
To
Build our nest
Make it best
Push our children
To spread their wings
Before
It takes a cage
To hear them sing;
Push our souls
To higher rise
Spread our wings
And
Kiss the sky...
©2010clarencecbess

Choice Words

The problem
Is choice.

Eloquence retreats
In matters of choice
As souls deem it fine
To impede on historical sensitivities.

The problem
Is you and I
Allowing those
Who would deny us the choice
To dictate our lives
With this illusion
Of making of difference
Through choice
Or better yet,
The will of the people
Knowing full well
Beyond emerald delicacies
Choice withers
Under the oppression of fact
That when given a choice
Inevitably
Someone will always make the wrong
Choice
Simply because
They choose to do so...
©2010clarencecbess

34

Yesterday fades
Tomorrow's conceived
But for today
Twilight
Caught between letting go
And holding on
As I view this growing collection
In my closet
Already overrun
With things I couldn't
Shouldn't
Wear
As I still attempt
To fit into existence
Despite my growing appetite
For difference.
©2010clarencecbess

Cyclical Degradation

Tired of writing
I want to live
As silent observation
Chronicling becomes me.

Now they all look the same
With their i-pods
Addidas
And cheap hats
Sold by cheap people
Who could give a shit about quality
Because
You
Could give a shit about quality;
Now
They sound the same
As they converse their computers
They niggaz
That nigga
And the mida
Who wouldn't provide that side of pussy
To go with his lame excuse
For masculinity...

Tired.
Old.
Just plain bored.
I need a new scene
New people
Even if only to inevitably discover
They are all the same
Laughing at the same jokes
Lamenting over the same coin
Wasting more precious moments
On the degradation of we.

I'm tired of writing.
I'm tired of observing.
I want to live.
Want to have someone write about
Me...
©2010clarencecbess

Binding Ties

Trying to make sense
Of ties that bind
I'm up a little late.

Stories flow
Stories I never imagined here
With us;
Not that things were ever perfect
But I know they did a better job
Than to deserve a fate
Second only to hell itself.

That sacrifice could be made
And not returned
Shouldn't shock me
Our world is still full of sin
Even after that ultimate sacrifice;
A side still pierced
To drain life's blood.

The errors unrecognized in youth
Become the troubles of age
Unless ties that bind
Are strengthened;
The ties that bind
Through adversity of the soul
Remain strong
Hopefully
Within me
As I draw closer
To those decisions
Situations
That beg one to prove
Ultimately show
Who they've become
Further along life's path.
©2010clarencecbess

The Wanting

Wanting you
I drown in dreams
Beneath the things
I want to do
Upon having you.

Wanting you
I occupy
Too many things denied
Beneath the flesh
Within the sins
Of places I want to go
So far to have you know
I want you so.

First star I see
I'll wish for you and me
First tear that falls
Waiting on your call
Makes sweeter everything
Truth of all
I want to do
Upon having you.

Wanting you
I'm skirting clues
Maybe it's too late
To swim in you
Without needing rescue
From beneath the blue
From beneath my pleas
Obstructing advancement
Through your tides
Seeking to drown my being
In my daydream
Which consumes
All I want to do
Upon having you...
©2010clarencecbess

Thank-You Note

Dedicated to my dad. Happy Father's Day...

"Thank-You Note"

Through silence
I thank you.
Through quiet existence
I thank you.
Through internal peace
I thank you.
Through spiritual affirmation
I thank you.
Through the struggle
Through the tears
Through the successes
Failures
I thank you.
Through their eyes
I thank you.

I've never been much of a man
But I'm an amazing individual
Who breathes
Exuding lessons
You knew only time would prove
Were learned well;
I never been much of a son
But everyday I'm entrusted
Asked
To be the father you were to me
And so I thank you.

I thank you today
Yesterday
Tomorrow
Every time
Decisions come
And I am able to respond
With pride
Confidence
Not just from myself
But others
Who look to me
To be the leader
They take me to be.

In honor
I thank you.
In principles
I thank you.
In honesty
I thank you.
Through Alike
Difference
Breath and blood
Time
I thank you.

What I was
What I am
What I shall be
I thank you.
©2010clarencecbess

Days Like This

Org. written yesterday, I got in too late to post it. In honor of June 7th, 2010... Enjoy!

"Days Like This"

It's days like this
Despite the sadness of the world
All is beautiful.

Days like this
Everyone smiles
Reminded
Of all that is beautiful.

You don't see the cracks
In sidewalks or life
And for a moment fleeting
You are transported back
To almost any time
Connected in the art
Of relaxation.

Days like this
Despite the truth
You never want to go away;
Despite the occasional cloud
You know the sun will shine again
That love will find a way
And ultimately
We will all be at peace
In the beautiful moments
Of memories
Of days like this.
©2010clarencecbess

June Paradox

Up
Warm
But
Cold
Thinkin'
Sippin' on my tea
Thinkin' equality
My meaning of
Free
Too much is
Free
No price to pay
We give
Sling it out to the masses
So much now they
Think
Without thinking
Entitlement
Where's mine?
In my pocket
Paradox being
I work for me
Yet I pay for you
Yours
And 'Sam gives you more money back?
Yet you say
That I am free
This and that is
Free;
Funny
Even the word includes
F-E-E...
©2010clarencecbess