Underneath

Won't it just go away.... Sometimes, I guess you just have to give in and go with it.

"Underneath"

Summer never came
So she escaped with the rain
Danced in the breeze
As the soil gave away
Underneath

Summer asked her to take
As she fought with the breeze
Danced in the rain
Letting go of her pain
With her soil washed away
Underneath

I glimpsed her alone
As she sought to be free
One with the sun that never came
One with a world bringing rain
Pale with no remorse
Devoid of shame
As the soil underneath
Tried to remain

She said soaked in the tears of the day
Still in her dance and my dream
'Time is the kiss that escapes
With the soil down to the shore
To go beyond the sea'
And I was pale
Devoid with release
As my soul joined in dance
Underneath
©2009clarencecbess

Emerald Release

It is wonderful being friends with a true artist... Thank you Tim for always being there with unconditional support and reminding me why I must never put away the joy of creation. You are the epitome of creativity and I can only hope that the world truly pay$ attention to you soon... Much love and respect!

Emerald Release - Acrylic on MDF - ©2009timothystachecki


"Emerald Release"

Must find my joy
Dive into the emerald release
Murky unknown
Forest eternal
That beckons deep in the stroke;

Must find my peace
Go into the emerald release
Beyond the borders of creation
Into the outside world of possibility
Technicolor innocence
Forest eternal
That beckons descending
Beyond each stroke so deep;

Must know my soul
Interpreted in the emerald release
Go beyond the black
Summoning at the base
Unfound
Eternal
To dance with the movement
Love with the strokes
That sweep so deep
In a universe of conception...
©2009clarencecbess

Distant

I feel the beast approaching...

"Distant"

I hear you cry
And I am still
Hear you cry
Only to deny my will
And my love
As broken heart instills
The right
To turn away from truths
Besides how could I
Compliment your youth that shines
As you cry
Silver wishes to light the night
Shame that I
Have to look away from your eyes
Deny the rise
Of warmth within my heart
As you cry
And I am still
Lost for words to describe
Just how I
Want to take your dreams
Steal you in the night
Undercover
Un
Denied
The way I trust you will in time
As you learn
Reasons I don't cry
And I am still
Even with the chance to make it right...
©2009clarencecbess

Strange Bedfellows

I've always tried to keep my baggage light, but lately I can't seem to fit it on the overhead rack...

"Strange Bedfellows"

I went to bed with a stranger
Woke ruined and diseased
Sold my soul
For momentary happiness
And now I can't rid myself

I went to bed with a stranger
Trusted my heart not to fall
Not to ask
For its desires
But the heart trumps the mind
And now I can't rid myself

I went to bed with a stranger
Woke up with myself
Lonely and bitter
Like the single drink
I'll have today
In an attempt to momentarily forget
That I'm a little bit older
Yet foolish like the young
I try to influence
With my stories of old;
What is rain without clouds?
Song without note?
My bed without a stranger
In the balance of things ...

I went to bed with a stranger
Discovered a little more of myself
Good and bad
Crazy and sane
All of them so beautiful
I'd do it all again
If I could rid myself
I'd do it all again
If I could rid
My
Self...
©2009clarencecbess

33

Birthdays for me are unfortunate reminders that there is SO much I've done, am doing, and need to get done. Though admittedly I can't complain, this b-day feels a little empty...a little blue.

"33"

I thought I was bound to love
As it turns out
I am bound to blue
Held by the black ties of history
Blinded by my pursuits
And the hapless souls who come
Ready and willing to give
Unfortunate cries
Falling beyond and behind
My blue skies
Summer dreams;

I thought I was bound to go
But I always end up bound to blue
Back at the beginning
On the soiled slate
Held by the consistency that escapes
Beyond mistakes
I learn from
But never solve
As I run out of time
Over and over again
In the blue that befriends;

I know I am bound to be
Forever bound to blue
Forever returning
Trying to forever escape
Creatures that call
Each time I lay
Closing my eyes
To dream of clear skies
Quiet and new
One without end
And the pain I've allowed to...
©2009clarencecbess

Gone

I never completely fill a writing journal. With that being said, this is the last piece written in my latest journal. Thank-you Johanna & Rona for the lovely journal and thank you Eric for the next generation...

"Gone"

That rushed exhale
A mixture of tired and frustration
At the lack for words
Again to sum up the moment
Come
Thinking in circles
Never coming to an end
Remaining at a beginning
Trying to sum up the moments
Gone
That return to comfort
A mixture of frustration and achievement
Waiting for the moment to come
Where decision and outcome
Unify
And sum up the moments
Gone
Lost between my fingers
Through pens
Shades of fall
And florescent pacifications
That never sleep
As they travel in circles
Never wanting for an end
And I am left to sum up the moments
Gone...
©2009clarencecbess

Vacant

At the end of it all... there is vacancy.

"Vacant"

After the sunset
Vacant
After the blue
Quiet still
Vacant
Black loneliness
And a return to reality
As there is no one to show
No one to see
No one to hold
No one to be
With
The way I was with you...

After the hills
Silence
After the burn
Hope
Reconstructed dreams
On the faces of inevitability
And a return to reality
As there will be nothing to show
Nothing to see
Nothing to hold
Nothing to be
Without
The way it was with you...
©2009clarencecbess

Puddle-Jumper Observation

I hate those little propeller planes... unfortunately to get to heaven, you may have to take a detour through hell...

"Puddle-Jumper Observation"

Like teeth
They jutted up
Sharp incisors
Reminders
Of age
Change
Inevitability
That they must come to me
As well as death
Uninvited
In the rotation of life
Here
There
Where I was
Am now
And going to;
Periodically a stray cloud
Sometimes miles in width
Would seek to shade
Transforming them into black seas
Deep
Pendulous
Heavy with the weight of my fears
Free
If only for a moment
From the sun
As it made scorching embers
Of each pebble in the mound;
Higher and higher they rose
An eerie attempt
At feasting upon us
Who skirted just beyond their reach...
Though in awe
I was never happier to see the coast.
©2009clarencecbess

Dessert Palette

I saw this once in a dream.
I know because like now
The world moved slowly by
(But I must say I am thankful
The wind is not currently in my face)
Sensuously undressing
Exposing more than I could ever see
Of the expanse
As it disappeared into the horizon
Where land and sky become one
An unfinished painting
Waiting for my imagination
The brush-stroke of creativity
To somehow punctuate
The possibilities that passed beneath me...
©2009clarencecbess

Leaving Phoenix

On the plane and leaving Phoenix heading towards Santa Barbara... Strange and beautiful from the air... ahhh inspiration.

"Leaving Phoenix"

I glimpse you
Naked
Bare
Unintended
Your folds and crevices
Story upon story
I am in awe
Of your powdered essence
Liquid to eyes of far
Dry and firm to the specs
Disappearing with each foot I rise;
I wonder
Where is your glory?
Do you sleep
Waiting to awake
Emerald and lush?
Is that how your name came about?
Because there was so much of nothing
Ragged and abused by the sun
That surely
Centuries of men
Heard your somber song
Deep in your hills and valleys
Knowing
That far beyond their eyes
You'd come again
As you were before
Free
Boundless and feathered...
©2009clarencecbess

Echo

Here we go again. It's 2009 and yet here we go again...


"Echo"

Hear myself
Again and again
This
Echo, echo
Tells me we cannot win
Faded star
Passes into memory
Yet
Echo, echo
Reverberates the misery;
Twenty-five children
Innocent
Unschooled
Educated now
In the
Echo, echo
Of the closing of a pool;
In this fight
On our screams
I hear
Echoes, echoes
To focus on the dream
Of silent belonging
When there are no longer things
That
Echo, echo
Our dark history
A
Nation, nation
To the table always brings
Never to clear away
Stains that still remain
In the
Echo, echo
Of It's actions to the wind
Which cause us all
To hear ourselves again...
©2009clarencecbess

Tell

He told her not to tell
That there was nothing wrong
With the way he felt
Looked upon her innocence
Unspoiled and oh so clean
What others would do to him
Would be so mean…

They told them not to tell
Not to give them options well
Not to show them acres green
Where children play
And every morning birds would sing
Because their colors
Well
Didn’t fit the scheme
The belief
Without their shades
It was a better dream
Their excuse
When everyone does it
It’s not so mean…

I wished that I could tell
Could’ve let him know
My mental hell
But the past has gone away
Older now
What would I say?
Old dogs can’t learn new tricks
Is what I’ve seen
To try now would be so mean…

They say you cannot tell
That they won’t ask
Just drop you in their hell
Claim you fight for liberty
The right to spread and breed
Return denied the human need
To love and nurture heart and seed
Last time I checked
It’s red that we all bleed
Survival that we scream
And yet we are so mean…

But who's got the right to tell?
©2009clarencecbess

Tired

Tired
Spent
The everyday drawl
In the language of survival
Making me foreign
To the prompt eloquence
Of the song that surrounds.

Tired
With first my bones
Then tissues
Drooping
Like heavy eyelids
Struggling
For that final glimpse
Of light as it slips away.

Spent
Broke again
Ingesting the shards
Those mistakes of the past
Only to choke and spew a dust to blanket
Walls and objects
Of yet another small room in which I reside.

Tired
About to fall asleep
In life
Dreams
Reduced to lay
Fetal
Returned to the start
To refresh all that I want
Can and will be…
©2009clarencecbess

Break

I just love this
The way you break
Me
Down
Expose the natural
Crack the shell
Bringing my soul forward
Center stage
Private spotlight
To dance

Just love
The way you break
Me
Down
With your stare
Increasing palpitations of desire
Between the murmurs of fear
Caused from the unhealed structures
Of a broken heart

Just love
This
Moments and memories
Coming from within
Channeled through my fingers
Breaking me
You
Down
To words eternal
Etched upon the digital white
Eternal
The way I want
I love
For you to
Break
Me
Down…
©2009clarencecbess

Absence

Why is there all this space all the time?

“Absence”

Silence and shadows
Wrapped in scents
Unforgettable

Absence
Makes the heart grow fonder

Liberty and constraint
Tease my soul
Playing delicate
In ginger sunsets I dream
Over steel horizons
That clamor for my attention
Unforgivable

Absence
Makes my heart pound faster

Hope and certainty
Wrapped in words
Unspoken

Absence
Makes my thoughts go wander

Beyond sunrises
Sunsets
And the differences
My needs bleed not to know

Absence
Makes desire of frustration…
©2009clarencecbess